Did I ever tell you how I met Bruce?

Did I ever tell you about how I met Bruce?

I met him many years ago while I was on a hike in the old mountains of Montana. It was getting late in the afternoon and I was heading back down towards the trail head. As a turned a corner I heard a big rumble in the brush just next to me.

Snort – snort – mmmggaahhhHHHH

Right in front of me blocking the path stepped a huge bear. And oh boy did this bear look sleepy. One thing I knew - don’t get a sleepy bear angry. Let me rephrase that – don’t get a bear angry.
I froze in my tracks. Hoping that maybe he would just wonder past and not pay any attention to me. I wasn’t that lucky. The massive drowsy beast turned his head and sniffed the air.

Snuuooorrttt – snort – mmmggaaHHHhhh
Maaggaaa Chuuuoooooo!!!

I can tell you from experience that a bear sneeze is one of the most terrifying things you can see up close. Of course instinctively I said “Bless you.”
The bear nodded his head slightly and said “Thank you, mate,” in a very pleasant British accent.

I almost fell backwards, not out of fear – but surprise. “You can talk?” I said, puzzled.

“I can juggle too. Would you like to come back to my cave for a spot of tea and some crumpets?”

“Uuummm … Sure.” I answered, not wanting to argue with a bear.

“Come on then”

We walked down the hill a little way and than right next to a big oak tree was the opening to his cave. “Its not much, but I call it home” he commented as we went in.

“If you don’t mind me asking,” I ventured “how did you learn to talk?”

“How very rude of me. I’m sorry. My name is Bruce. I used to work for the British Royal Circus. Hence the accent.”

I had to stop my mouth from dropping wide open. I did my best to be polite as the huge bear poured me a warm cup of tea.

“Sorry if the crumpets are a little on the dry side. I made them yesterday, and it was pretty hot today. “

I tried them, and wow – they were good. I don’t know if I’d ever had such a good crumpet. “Did you say that you could juggle?” I asked.

“Oh yeah, I love to juggle. They taught me when I was in the Circus. You wanna see?”

“Uuuhh OK”

“Great!” Bruce ran into the other part of the cave, opened a bright blue trunk and got ready. A second later he came back wearing a red pointy hat and blue vest. He set down his unicycle and started to ride about the cave in a perfect circle. As he came back to the center of the cave he looked at me with a big toothy grin. I couldn’t help but laugh and clap. He pulled three red balls out from under his hat and juggled them.

That’s how I met Bruce the Juggling Bear. He still lives up there in the old mountains. Whenever I’m in the area I stop in to see him. He always has a cup of tea ready for me.
Last summer, he tried to teach me to juggle, but I just could get it. He kept wanting to give me a fish every time I would catch a ball.

I found out that day that not every massive, sleepy looking, really really big bear is mean.